Turn Off the Radio

I turn on the radio as I'm blazing down the I-5, looking for an upbeat song to jam out to as I fly by the gorgeous California Coast, but all I find is disappointment. This isn't because I'm some trendy hipster who only listens to "underground tracks that I'm sure you've never even heard of." It's not because I only listen to showtunes (I swear, there's variety on my iPhone). And it's certainly not because I have a problem with swearing (I watched Book of Mormon, after all). It disappoints me because a majority of these songs perpetuate negative attitudes towards women. This misogyny is a direct reflection of the disrespect towards women in American Society. The worst part is that many artists are subliminalizing these messages through catchy tunes- half the time you don't even know what you're listening to.

A few months ago, I was on a party bus en route to a date dance for my sorority. Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines" was blasting through the speakers, and we were all dancing and singing along. Then I stopped. Wait... am I singing about Rape? His lyrics profess "I know you want it. I know you want it. You're a good girl. Can't let you get past me." Although this isn't even close to some of the notoriously crude rap songs out there, I was shocked. This song plays on the radio, I hear young kids sing this at the theatre. Not only do the lyrics sing about pressuring a women into sex, but they insinuate that "good girls" are incable of having sexual urges. So, although the woman keeps brushing him off, he knows she wants it. This encourages a culture in which men are taught not to take "no" for an answer. This contributes to a society in which victimes are blamed- she asked for it. She wanted it. Robin Thicke, let me assure you that she does not, in fact, want it.
Pop songs like "Blurred Lines" are only the tip of the iceberg. There are countless pop, rap, and even country songs that make Robin Thicke look like Mr. Rogers.

“I'm tryna find the words to descrive this girl without being disrepectful. Damn girl, who's a sexy b*tch.” – David Guetta 

I appreciate the effort to not be disrespectful, David Guetta, but calling her a 'sexy bitch' probably isn't the best route.

“When I first saw that bikini top on her she was poppin' right out of that South Georgia water. Thought 'Oh, good lord, she had them long tanned legs.' Couldn't help myself.” – Florida Georgia Line

When you remove the charming country twang, this song gets a lot more creepy, objectifying, and mysognistic.

 “Slut, you think I won’t choke no whore / Til the vocal cords don’t work in her throat no more?!” – Eminem

Yay domestic violence. Eminem, you are such a good role model. 

Some people might ask what kind of influence is Popular music having on our culture? But I think it's far more important to ask what kind of influence has our culture had on popular music? How has our societies values and beliefs been represented in pop music, and more importantly, what can we do to change those?
I don't want to live in a society where "b*tches ain't sh*t but hoes and tricks" is representative of our belief system.

Life Update: My New Apartment!

Yupp, I moved into my first place! The title of this post is a bit deceiving, though, as I wouldn't really say it's 'new,' since I have been living here for nearly three months now (sorry blog).

My lovely living room

After winter break,  I knew I needed a change- living in the dorms just wasn't working for me. I felt homeless. Not homeless like I did't have a place to live, but homeless like I didn't have a home. I didn't feel at home in the dorms, and when I visited my parent's house, that didn't feel like home anymore either. I needed a place of my own. So, I packed up my things, grabbed my Chihuahua, and within three days of making the decision to get my own apartment, I put the deposit down on a gorgeous unit in La Jolla. It's the perfect size for me- cozy, but not cramped. The location is wonderful- central, but not too busy. The complex is just right- peaceful, but not too quiet. And, most importantly, I feel totally safe and comfortable here. I couldn't have picked a better place!
Having my own place has been such an adventure! It has really helped me grow up and become more independent. Some of it has been really fun, like decorating the walls and crafting for my entry way; and some of it has been not so fun, like trying to cook dinner and accidentally making potatoes explode all over the stove (who knew you had to cut holes in them before you cook them?) But, coming home every evening to a gorgeous place that is all my own is the best thing I could ever ask for. I feel like a real adult, and that's kind of scary.
When I was young, I always looked at adulthood and childhood as black and white- One day you just wake up, put on a suit, and don't like to color or play pokemon anymore. But, as it turns out, the transition from adulthood to childhood is quite gray. Yeah, now I pay bills, and taxes, and go to college, but I also still giggle when someone says "duty" and still shove all my clothes in my closet when I don't feel like cleaning them. I still feel like a twelve year old, and part of me hopes that never changes.

I guess you could call this my 'dining room table'

I seriously love all the natural light this place gets in the mornings!

TV & bookshelf in the living room!

The entry way

My Kitchen (It's a bit messy oops)

I feel like the walls are so plain in here (but I'm too poor to get more artwork *sigh*)

My headquarters for schoolwork (aka netflix)

My bedroom

Actually obsessed with my showercurtain

Bathroom!

My porch is so cute I love it.

Spring Break Trips! 2015

This Spring Break was definitely an adventure! After spending 4 days in Mexico with my boyfriend and some of his friends, I went on a 8 day road trip with my family in our RV. I couldn't be more happy with my experience on both trips! It was a blast.

MEXICO!

We drove from San Diego to the Rosarito area, and stayed in a community called Las Gaviotas. It was beautiful, spacious, right on the beach, and felt totally safe! It was filled with mostly fellow-spring breakers. The trip was amazing, and we fit so much in to our short visit! We had the best (and cheapest) lobster dinner I've ever had in Puerto Nueva. We ate fresh seafood off fisherman's boats in Papotle. We bargained for souvenirs in Ensenada. And, I even danced on the bar at Rosarito Beach! Not to mention, the unforgettable memories at our humble abode on the Las Gaviotas beach. It was my first 'big' trip without my parents, and it couldn't have been more amazing! I made a video documenting our trip, check it out bellow! 

FAMIILY ROADTRIP!

Trip number two was a family road trip to Moab, Utah. It was the maiden voyage with our brand new RV, so we really weren't sure what to expect, but it truly couldn't have been a more adventurous and enjoyable experience. We ventured through Arizona, Nevada, Utah, and (of course) California. Our days consisted of hikes, breath-taking views, sand dunes, historic landmarks, river walks, and and lots of laughs. My mom did an amazing job of cooking delicious and organic meals in the microscopic RV kitchen, so it was wonderful to not fall behind on my weight-loss journey despite being on the road. 

Living on my own, I have really missed spending time with my family. It was so nice to have a week  snuggled into a tiny RV together, just enjoying each other's company.

Spring Break 2015 was the best and most memorable spring break to date! It was the perfect balance of crazy college adventure, and invaluable family time. 

What Love Looks Like

It seems like nowadays, having two parents who live together is pretty uncommon.
Even more uncommon, is having two parents who live together and like living together.
And just about unheard of, is having two parents who live together, like living together, and genuinely love eachother.
I say "just about" unheard of, because of my parents. I have never met two people more in love with eachother than my parents.

When I was growing up, I thought it was totally normal to have a mom and dad who pretty much acted like teenagers in their "honeymoon phase" 24/7. They cuddled on the couch when we watched movies, ALWAYS held hands wherever we went, skyped every night when my dad was on a trip, and a day didn't go by where I didn't hear them say they loved eachother. My brother and I would scream "EWWWWWW Gross!" at the sight of them kissing in the kitchen while making dinner, which was a very common sight.

As a child, I thought that that's how everyone must live their lives: You find someone, you marry them, and you're that happy forever. That's the way it works. That's the way it's supposed to be, right? But as you grow up, you realize that the way it's supposed to be, isn't always the way it plays out.

As I got older, I realized that my parents weren't the norm- they were the expection. By middle school, most of my friend's parents were divorced. And for those that weren't, they described anguish in their home lives and between their parents. Their was alot of fighting, anger, and even abuse, but definitely not love. I watched as the discontented relationships of their parents really took an emotional them. In highschool, many of those friends struggled to have meaningful friendships and relationships of their own.
If you don't have a working model for what real-life love looks like, how can you create it on your own? Yeah, Nicholas Sparks movies hot and steamy and romantic, but what happens when the drama is over and the screen fades to black? How do those characters create a healthy, loving relationship that will last a lifetime? I looked at my parents, and knew that that is what love was.

My parent's loving marriage is also what made them really great parents. By receiving so much love from eachother, they were able to pour that love into the lives of my brothers and I. They were always patient, loving, and joyful with us; Always able to be fun and silly with us. They loved spending time with eachother, which made for lots of family game nights, hikes, and trips. The meaningful relationships they built with each of us lead to amazing friendships between my brothers and I. Don't get me wrong, we still bicker like any normal siblings (probably moreso). But beneath that, we really love eachother and enjoy spending time together. My parents brought out the best in eachother, so they brought out the best in us. They created a household and a family that was truly built out of love and centered around God. They loved us so much, because they loved eachother so much.

My parents are going on 25 years of marriage and nearly 30 years of dating, and their love really does seem to grow every day. They truly showed me first hand what love looks like, and gave me the best upbringing I could ever ask for. With all the turmoil that my teenage years have brought, I always had a supportive and steady household to anchor myself in, and that is all thanks to my parents and the love they have for eachother. 

When I was 12, I was running errands with my dad. While we were driving, "All Your Life" by The Band Perry came on the radio. The words coming form the speakers said,

Would you walk to the edge of the ocean

Just to fill my jar with sand?

Just in case I get the notion

To let it run through my hand.

My dad turned to me and said,  "You know, I would do that for your mom."
And that's what I think love is. That's what my parents have shown me love is.

DIY: Spring Wreath

I absolutely LOVE Do It Yourself (DIY) projects! I've always been a crafty person, and being an assistant costumer at the Broadway Theatre for 2 years and joining a sorority have both given me plenty of chances to be creative and crafty. Now that I'm living in my very first apartment, I've been going a little crazy on the DIY projects to decorate. As a college student, my crafting budget is pretty much non existant, so I like to find ways to repurpose old things, and find my supplies very cheap. 

I've made a few wreaths before, but I've always followed a template or a picture from pintrest or a crafting blog when designing it. This time, I did it totally 'freehand' without looking at any pictures for inspiration or ideas- it was all me! I'm really surprised with how well it came out! Regardless of if you live in an apartment, dorms, or with your parents, wreaths are the perfect way to make it feel more "homey" and decorate for the season. 

Supplies:

1 blue flower busshel (dollar tree)

4 white flower bushels (dollar tree)

1 Medium Wreath ($5 Michael's)

4 Letters to Spell "Home" ($.50/each Michael's)

*Burlap 

*Blue Paint

*Sponge Brush

*Hot Glue Gun

***These are items I already had, but you can get them pretty much anywhere (Michael's, Dollar Tree, Walmart Ect.

Step #1

First, I cut about 6 inches of the bottom of the stems of the white flower bushells so they weren't so long. Then, I hot glued 2 white flower bushells on the left side of the wreath facing upwards. Use the glue generously, and don't worry if it looks messy- Once you put the bigger flower on you can't see any of the glue. Then, I hot glued the other 2 going the opposite way on the same side.

Step #2

Cut the stem of the blue bushell off, leaving only about an 2 inches of the stem attatched to the flowers. Put some hot glue on the end of the stem and stick it into the left side of the wreath in between the white bushells.

Step #3

This was definitely my favorite part because I love to paint. Paint the letters with a sponge brush, brushing only downwards so that the letters get that pinstriped look. Another alternative I considered in lue of having the wreath say "home" is using the house number for your address or your last name! I decided to go with "home" because there's a song in the Broadway Production of Beauty and the Beast called home that I adore.

Step #4 

Make a bow out of burlap, ribbon, or really any material! First, take the material and fold it so it looks like the breast cancer ribbon. Next, pinch the center of tthe fabric so that it comes together as a bow. Last, cut a 1 inch swatch of material to tie the center together. You can also add a little hot glue (I really do love hot glue) to the middle so that it will stay together. Now you have your bow!

Step #5

Hot glue the bow and the letters onto the wreath to have your finished product! Yay wreaths!

I had an absolute blast making this wreath! Feel free to follow the steps and recreate it, or make your own version. DIY projects are my favorite hobby, so look out for more on my blog in the future (:

Channel Your Inner Disney Princess: Body Positivity Through the Eyes of a Weekend Princess

Although most college students have to slum through flipping burgers or answering phones until they have their degree, I am lucky.
There seems to be a growing industry, at least in southern california, of "birthday party princesses." A few years ago, increasingly more and more of my actor friends were working for these companies. It's the perfect fit for an aspiring performer: entertaining at parties and events on weekends, and pursuing their acting career during the week. I watched enviously on the sidelines, wishing I could have a job like that.

Not only do I love performing Disney songs (the notorious mezzo-soprano princess belt is right in my sweet spot), but I LOVE kids. Since I aspire to be a theatre educator, I couldn't think of a more perfect job... but I never even apllied. Why? Well, as a size 8 or 9 at the time, I thought I could never pass for one of the unrealisticly thin Disney Princesses.  I felt unconfident and lethargic, 2 qualities that don't exactly scream "Disney Princess." So, I pushed that little dream to the side, thinking that I could never and would never look and feel like my beauitful friends who worked for those companies.

And then something really awesome happened.

Well, at the time I didn't think it was really awesome, but it turned out to be. 2 years ago, I went through a really bad breakup. Without someone else to constantly dote on, I was alone with my thoughts, and it made me realize how unhappy I had become with myself and my appearance. For the first time in my life, I was uncomfortable wearing shorts, I couldn't run more than a mile without stopping, and I definitely looked a far cry from "Disney Princess." So, I decided to do something about it.
My weight has always been something I incesently worried about. Throughout middle school and high school, I yo-yod from being thin to the point that friends and family were worried, to overweight to the point that I hardly recognized myself. I fasted, I binged, I purged, I took diet pills, I tried every crash diet known to man, and guess what? Nothing lasted. I decided that this was the end of that, and I was going to loose the weight permanently and in a healthy manner. Instead of focusing on weight loss, I focused on becoming healthy. I wanted to feel good inside, and overtime that translated to the way I looked on the outside. In the back of my mind, I always kept that goal that someday I could be one of those "Disney Princess" girls.

Over about 8 months, I lost 28 pounds. But more importantly, I gained confidence. I broke the cycle of gaining and loosing weight, and learned how to create a healthy lifestyle that is sustainable. People have been asking me, "what's your secret?" expecting some sort of one step magic "fix-all" that will make them thin and confident. The truth is, I didn't do anything ground breaking. I ate food, I drank water, I excercised regularly, and I didn't worry about having that 'perfect' body. I focused on myself, and becoming the person I wanted to be.
 Today, I am supporting myself through college by-you guessed it- being a birthday party princess. I'm still a far cry from the slim 'ideal' waist that is perpetuated by Disney Princesses, but that doesn't stop me from looking and acting the part. Now I am healthy, happy, and confident, three qualities that make me look and feel just as much of a 'disney princess' as any size 2.
In short, size doesn't matter. What does matters is the way you feel. What matters is getting to a point where you can be body positive and comfortable in your own skin.
Be healthy, be happy, be confident, and channel your inner Disney Princess. 

Spring Awakening: The Problem with Censoring

Spring Awakening is undoubtedly one of the most powerful musicals ever written. It's pretty heavy stuff, and for some people that can be too much, especially because it's performed by teenagers. For those of you who don't know, Spring Awakening is a musical that centers around a young group of teens in the 1890's who are struggling with rape, abuse, sexuality, puberty, depression, suicide, teen pregnancy, abortion, and their sexual orientation, among other things. All but one of the characters lack an honest, guiding adult figure to help them through the difficulty of teenage years. The rest of the teens' parents just try and brush it under the rug, leaving the teens confused and at a loss for what is happening with their body and minds. The teens are without any truthful information about these tough topics, left to figure out sex and sexuality on their own. 

As I stated earlier, Spring Awakening is one of the most powerful musicals ever written. Why? Because this is a problem that we experience every day. It may not be the 1890's, but kids and teens are still growing up with misguided ideas about themselves and sexuality in general; And many adults are still 'solving' this problem by sweeping it under the rug.

Educating teens on the truth 
about sex and their bodies is the first step in solving this problem. Yes, there are sexual education programs in schools, but so many of these give wrong and useless information to the students. My high school's sexual education program consisted of scaring us into absitenence by showing us all the different STD's we could catch, without any real information on what sex is and how it works; A friend of mine was taught in her seventh grade sexual education class that if women have sex before marriage they are "spoiled" and won't be able to find a husband; while another friend of mine, who attended private school, did not receive sexual education at all. 

Upon further research, there are some really frightening statistics about sexual education in the United States. Less than half of the states in the U.S mandate Sexual Education, and only 10 of those states require the material to be medically accurate. According to a study done by PBS in 2008, America has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the developed world. In addition, 41% of teens aged 18-19 said they knew little or nothing about condoms or other contreceptives. 64% said they had used the internet to try and find information about sex, and upon further investigation, PBS found that over 1 in 2 of these commonly used sexual information websites were innaccurate. For those kids who receive wrong information, or no information at all, they often turn to movies, television, and the internet to try and learn about sex. Do we really want our kids learning about sex from 50 Shades Of Grey? Yeah, I didn't think so. 


I whole heartedly understand that parents want to preserve their children's innocence, and are worrried about them experimenting with sex too soon; But if we just give them real, useful, and honest information about sexuality, gender, and puberty then they will have the right tools to make educated decisions about sex throughout the entirety of their lives. Sheltering kids from the truth about sex may seem 'easier' than talking to them about it, but the result is really damaging. The fact of the matter is, if parents and schools don't educate teens on sex, they will get the information elsewhere; And that information is going to be tainted. 
Spring Awakening has a tragic ending. This 'censoring' leads to one teen commiting suicide, one dying of a botched abortion, two others damaged victims of sexual abuse, and one (the one who educated by his parents about sex) alive and in disbelief of what censoring has done to his friends. 
The lessons learned from Spring Awakening are of the upmost importance. Sex and sexuality need to be discussed truthfully, fully, and honestly with kids and teens. Let's make real life have a different ending, and stop censoring youth from the from the facts of life.